Have you ever noticed that no matter how clearly you think you’ve set expectations, everyone still comes to you for answers?
Every question. Every small decision. Every little “Hey, can you take a quick look at this?”
If that sounds familiar, you might be the bottleneck in your own organization.
Don’t worry—it’s not because you’re doing something wrong. It’s because you’ve trained your team (without meaning to) to come to you first.
Let’s walk through how to fix it step-by-step.
Step 1: Stop Solving Every Problem Yourself
The next time someone walks into your office—or pings you on Slack—with a problem, start by asking one simple question:
“What have you tried so far?”
That one question changes everything.
It forces people to think before defaulting to you. Did they look up an answer? Ask a peer? Check their notes? Use AI?
If their response sounds like, “I haven’t done anything yet,” it’s your cue to push back gently. You’re training them to think, not just to escalate.
Because when you’re the first stop for every problem, you’re also the biggest roadblock for progress.
Step 2: Teach the 1-3-1 Rule
Here’s a rule I’ve seen transform communication inside teams—the 1-3-1 rule (this idea comes from Dan Martell).
When someone brings you a problem, they need to bring you:
- 1 clearly defined problem
- 3 possible solutions
- 1 recommendation on what they think is best
It’s simple but incredibly effective.
This approach forces your team to think critically and come prepared. They stop dumping problems and start presenting options.
That shift not only saves you time—it grows their problem-solving muscle too.
Step 3: Coach, Don’t Just Correct
Now, if they’ve truly done the work—explored ideas, brought options—and they’re still stuck, that’s where your leadership really matters.
But rather than just giving them the answer, take a moment to explain the why behind it. Walk them through how you thought about it, what you looked for, and the principles that guided your decision.
You’re not just solving the immediate issue—you’re transferring decision-making knowledge.
Each of these coaching conversations chips away at the dependency loop your team has on you.
Step 4: Take Off the “Chief Problem Solver” Hat
Let’s be honest—it feels good to be the go-to person. It’s validating. But over time, it also becomes exhausting.
If you want a business or department that can run smoothly without you being in every inbox and meeting, you’ve got to let that hat go.
The more you empower your team to handle challenges on their own, the more your time opens up for the work only you can do—vision, growth, and leadership.
Final thought
Being the bottleneck isn’t a leadership flaw. It’s a signal. It means your team trusts you—but it also means they still need your help learning how to trust themselves.
So, next time someone comes to you for an answer, resist the urge to fix it right away. Ask questions. Coach through it. Build thinkers, not just doers.
That’s what real leadership looks like.
Stephanie German is a business coach for small businesses focused on strategy and impact who are ready to take action with scalable guidance without the non-sense. She directly works with owners, founders, and leaders through a specific framework to compress time, increase income, and boost productivity. Find out ways to work together here.